Again today we’ve been going through a whole raft of photos and we’ve chosen this one to sit alongside Alfie’s ashes. It’s a lovely photo of him with his head on the first stair, looking up at us getting ready as we’d told him he was about to go “Walkies” it sums him up perfectly. Beautiful boy 🥰
Alfie’s ashes – new picture
The second one we received as an anniversary present from my sister in Lancashire. It’s a lovely hand drawn pencil picture by a talented young lady of all our three boys. Bottom Left is Muffin who we had at the start of our marriage 33 years ago, bottom right is Digger who was next, and on the top with his trademark cocked head is our little Alfie. This is the only picture my wife wants on the wall of the boys as it is the three of them together.
The three boys. Muffs, Digs and Alf
What memories we have, and thousands of pictures to look back on and smile. We were so privileged to be gifted these three wonderful little souls. We have been so fortunate and lucky.
That was the call we’ve just had from the vets. A lovely and quite melancholy call to be honest, just as if he’s had a minor procedure and he has awoken and is now ready to come home.
Reality is a little more stark. We are now heading down to collect our little fellah after he has been cremated.
Our beautiful lad has come home
We didn’t know what to expect to be honest, do we take a bag? Is he in a polythene bag? My wife was upset as she’d taken the call as I had been on nights and was in bed. I had this overwhelming feeling yesterday that he’d be coming home today, so in a way when I awoke I wasn’t surprised, strange isn’t it?
We needn’t have fretted, it was all so professional. He’s in a lovely woodland scene tube, we didn’t want a sealed casket as we wanted his ashes to go with ours in the end, please don’t judge us, it’s what we want and you will never understand just what this little character meant to us.
Paw print Lock of hairA beautiful paw print photo frame
We also have a certificate of individual cremation, with lovely words, we have a lovely little picture frame memento with his paw print, we now have to pick a picture from the thousands we have of him, no easy task and I suspect we will have words about this. The vets have taken a cutting of his fur and put it in a small phial, lovely touch. We have two beautiful cards with his paw print on, and I will be using one of these to get a permanent tattoo on my arm with his pet name as he was known to many in the family- “Alfie Moon”.
The feeling in the house at the moment is nice, all the doubt we had has now gone, and we are so happy with the professional service we have experienced.
We can now move on to the healing stage, as he is now home. It’s so weird that the immense feeling of grief has lifted and a modicum of calmness and happiness has returned, it needed to as it had been missing for some time now.
Our lad is home, where he deserves to be. And he will be with us forever more.
Yesterday was a vile day as at 13:20 we said goodbye to our beloved little boy Alfie. He features on this site as there is an album of his pictures here: Alfie
Our beautiful lad
He has been very unwell for the last couple of years but in recent months his condition has progressed to the point that his little body was gradually shutting down, and the wonderful little character he had was starting to wane. He was just 11.5 years old.
Those who do not enter into relationships with animals will never understand what I’m posting here, however I’m sure a good number of you will understand. To be honest I’m not really worried who reads this, I’m writing this as I do most of my posts for personal reasons and to help me express my feelings and journalise my thoughts.
We are heartbroken. We were never able to have children, so we took on this dog as we had our previous two, as a stand in for the child we could never have. And that’s how they were treated. They featured in everything we did as a family, they went everywhere with us and everyone who met them had a story to tell of the little antics they experienced with them.
Alf – our little fellah
A dog leaves his paw print on your heart. In fact a dog will steal your heart, he plays with it all his life and when he leaves you he breaks it into a million pieces. That’s not a bad thing, but it hurts to a level I can’t explain.
When my parents passed I cried and I was emotional, of course I was, but I have unashamedly cried more tears for this little fellah. I think the difference is that we were his whole world, he depended on us. We had to feed him, water him, walk him and look after his well being and for the last few years we’ve medicated, washed, treated him and ensured he had his ever growing list of medications. He was fully dependent on us whereas our parents were not and they had two families to help and care.
Alf was special to us, we didn’t go looking for him, he came to us under strange circumstances that I can’t write here. It was meant to be. He came to us and was with us through some of the most testing and awful times we have experienced in our married life. He was our comfort, he helped us, he stayed with us when others just walked away. He saw it through and though he was only small he was our little lion, he protected us.
Now he has left us, his job is done. For whatever reason he came to us he has filled our hearts with beautiful memories, however he has broken them irreparably with his leaving.
Last night was strange. I could still hear his little movements as my mind was playing tricks. In the early hours I could hear my wife quietly weeping as if she has lost a child, the connection she had with him was unique and now he’s not there.
I give her a cuddle and we just talk about him, we laugh lightly, but it always turns to tears.
We’ve had three wonderful little dogs in our married life, all surrogate children to us but they’ve all had to go. Alfie is our last. There will be no more, as the pain is just too severe and I don’t think our hearts could take any more damage. Their leaving is the most horrendous feeling to go through as the guardians of one of these beautiful animals.
Alfie
I took him for his last walk yesterday, to be honest it wasn’t much of a walk, he sat at the entrance of the park and just watched the world go by. We were approached by a beautiful 11month old puppy called dolly who wanted to play but he just let her sniff around, he had nothing left in the tank. It was then our time to go as we had to see the vets.
He built a relationship with two vets, Kian and Emily and they loved him. Fortunately they were both there yesterday to prepare him for his last journey. They were so good with him, and us, he was peaceful there, they treated him so well and he remained in our arms right up to his final breath. He knew he was loved, and he loved us.
He’s now gone, and we have a massive dog shaped hole in our hearts that the memories we have of him will hopefully fill over time.
If you are ever gifted one of these beautiful animals, remember.
They are only here for part of your life, but to them you are their whole life.
You will experience no other unconditional love and affection. And we have been very fortunate to have been blessed with three of the finest in our marriage.
Rest in eternal peace dear Alf, cross that rainbow bridge and there will be two little dogs on the other side awaiting you. Run free, no pain now, Mum and Dad love and miss you so much.
We will all meet again, and it gives us great comfort to think you will be there wagging your tails when our time comes.
I’m going to be quite boring and predictable here, I’m a dog person having had the same breed of dog (Bichon Frise) throughout my married life, about 33 years now. Alf has been our constant companion for the last eleven years and is just an all round super fellow, funny little bundle of joy.
Alf – our little fellah
I’ve put Cats here as the worst, not that they are a particularly bad pet, but for me I have a severe allergy to them and their fur, so for me they are not a practical pet to be in my presence if I want to maintain an acceptable level of breathing. I used to have one as a pet as a youngster and that’s how I found out about this allergy.
Tabs – Feral cat
However there is an aside to this. When we purchased this house a few years ago there was a cat in all the outside photos of the property and we assumed the previous owner had one as a pet. We were very wrong. No one owns this cat known to us as “Tabs”. She is a feral cat that took ownership of this area many years ago and we live on her property. She is not scared of any animal, absolutely loves our Alf as she knows he is a right softy.
This garden is her territory, she chases foxes and any other uninvited visitors to the garden, she is an excellent mouser and will also bring evidence to the back door to prove this, much to the displeasure of the wife. She’s fed regularly by us as a result, and she is always missed if she goes off wandering for a few days as she often does.
So really there is no best or worst here, Im basing it solely on my own selfish “health” problems. She’s a lovely cat, I can’t touch her (she wouldn’t let me anyway) so we have a mutual distant respect for each other. She’s the dogs best friend though and they get on fantastically.
The dog has been through so much with us, helped us through some very tough times just by being a lovely form of stress relief for us. His companionship is without condition and his loyalty is unique. He’s my boy, he deserves nothing but utter love and respect. A true pet lover would understand.
Foxes Den 
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