Tag: relationships

Was three, now two

What relationships have a positive impact on you?

This kind of makes me laugh. I was talking to my nephew yesterday and we were talking about Antisocial media. He was quite proud to tell me he had 875 friends on Fakebook and was quite putout when I told him he was having a laugh. I asked him to name as many of these friends as he could in 30 seconds, and he could probably reel out about 10 or 12 max. And there is my point, people on social media are not friends and a positive impact on you, nine times out of ten they are there to have a nosey around your life or to try and big up their own lives by stating “Oh look at the friends I’ve got. They’re not friends get over it. They’re doing it for likes.

That’s me off his Christmas list now.

Myself I can count my true friends on my hands. In fact I only need the one hand, in fact I only need two fingers, it was three before August but a death put paid to that relationship.

Now it is two. My wife who I trust implicitly, what she has done for me is just unbelievable, without her I would have been long gone many years ago, she has saved my life. Literally.

Second is my buddy Dave, i probably hear from him twice a year but we are there for each other we would truly go into battle for each other, this bond is strong and its roots go back to our childhood.

Trust is the foundation of a good strong relationship, it is a back bone, break it and there is no more stability.

875 friends eh? They’d all run a mile if you ever needed them.

Peace to your day.

Over familiarity

What personality trait in people raises a red flag with you?

There are a few traits in people that get me thinking and questioning them but I guess the one that really does it for me is over familiarity.

People work hard to develop relationships, and I like to think I’m one of those people that is quite a good judge of character when it comes to meeting people. I personally have a trait that I know others will not like and that is that I am quick to judge people. I think it’s a defensive mechanism that has stood me in good stead, in my personal opinion. To be honest I think it ties in perfectly with what I have stated as being the trait that raises the red flag with me.

I find it a lot at work, new managers and fellow staff who seem to want to hop that period of building work relationships and go straight to the “I know more than you” category. Especially those who know very little and have been sitting in a classroom for the last four years sucking money out of the bank of mum and dad.

These actions normally activate my “judgement“ trait pretty quickly and all interest drains from me from that moment on.

In life, building bridges and foundations is a major part of moving around work society. You wouldn’t build a premises without foundations so why would you attempt to do the same with relationships?

You are setting yourself up to fail.

Have a great day.

Thoughts 3/6/24

List three books that have had an impact on you. Why?

  • Cosmos – Carl Sagan
  • Cider with Rosie – Laurie Lee
  • The bitter lemons of Cyprus – Lawrence Durrell

I was a kid of the sixties, one of Apollos children as I lived through those heady days of the space race. Carl Sagan was one of those superb teachers that could bring a highly complex scientific process down to a level every one could understand and there haven’t been that many people who have followed him who can do the same. I have read the book and watched the series many times, I’m sure I will do the same soon.

I love Laurie Lees ability to be able to teleport you into his life as a child growing up in the country. I first read this book at school and then read it again about 30 years later. The things you notice in this book as an adult against what you read as a child shows how much our knowledge and attention grows as you mature. It’s a go to holiday read for me as it’s one of those comfortable books. His other books about the Spanish civil war are also very well written and insightful.

I love Cyprus and everything about it. This book by Lawrence Durrell gives a fascinating insight into the old ways of the island pre-invasion, as he travels around documenting the many people and ways of the island. I must have read this book a good six times now and I never tire of it. I suspect number seven will be coming up very soon.

You can’t beat a relationship with a good book.

Have a peaceful day everyone.