This is a poem I heard read just a few days ago at a work colleagues funeral. It could just as well refer to our wonderful dog who we lost in August of last year.
It’s a beautiful poem with wonderful sentiment. I believe it is quite popular at funerals, however it’s the first reading of it I have ever heard.
Peace.
Anger. We experience it every day, we even contribute to it but do we really understand it?
In my job I experience it every day, yesterday was a particularly bad day when a simple question, “How did you get in that door?” Brought a protracted rant and so much anger that I felt in danger of being assaulted at one point. I just had to walk away as the person in question had done a full nought to crazy in about 2 seconds. And for the last 24hrs all I’ve been asking myself is why? A simple question did not warrant such a reply and I was shocked.
Apart from that there is anger everywhere. On the roads, in public areas and retail environments just to mention a few. But why?
The gene or whatever that controls fight or flight seems to have become stuck in fight mode just like a switch that has malfunctioned. Everyone believes their understanding is the right one and they will not move from that stance. The ability to reason has disappeared and no one wants to lose face. That’s an issue, as you are a better person if you attempt to understand, absorb, consider and then give a constructive opinion on what is occurring.
But this ability has been leapfrogged and just does not appear to be used anymore. It is as if you are a winner if you can be the most abusive, loudest and the least unreasonable person within the issue.
You are not.
I don’t class myself as weak for walking away and not escalating issues, I try to calm an issue down, but sometimes it is as if the individual has so much angst and venom that has built up over time, that you are the one who unfortunately gets both barrels. Trying to reason with people like this is like giving them a cannon, it’s aimed right at you and the anger increases. You start to feel angry yourself, mainly through the frustration of not being listened to.
That’s it, the art of reasoning has gone. Oh how I wish for the days of constructive disagreement where every party had a say and could agree to disagree without violence and threats to life.
Why I feel this way after 24 hrs is just me. I pick over things too intently, I question myself on how I could have handled things better and then come to the conclusion that I did everything right. I now ask the question of “Why was there such an anger directed at me” for a simple question, and despite a lot of deep thought I just can’t give an honest answer. And I don’t want to get into the head of a person who obviously has deeper issues. I’m just pleased I walked away from this as I dread to think what the outcome could have been.
I haven’t answered my own question of, “why are people so angry” but I’ve offered some opinions. Reasoning or the ability to, or even the lack of ability is at the crux of the issue in my sincere opinion, and it’s getting worse as time moves on.
Is reasoning taught, or is it something we learn socially as we move on in our lives?
Maybe anger management courses need to become a staple of modern social behaviours and understanding.
Have a peaceful and anger free day.
There are many blogs I follow on this platform. One I follow religiously is the “Anxiety unplugged project”
For anyone who has moments when they just can’t fathom out what is going on, I’d recommend latching on to this site and just taking in some of the superb advice and guidance available.
Why not? We all have times of stress and anxiety and a few minutes spent reading some good honest advice is no inconvenience to anyone.
Stay safe. Peace to you all.
What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?
There are a number of movies and tv series that I have watched multiple times over the years, however one from each category really stands out for me.
I have grown up with the James Bond franchise, as have many in my age group, and these films are still watched and enjoyed to this day.
But these are not my favourites. These are my favourites below.
Film wise I absolutely love the old James Stewart classic “The Glenn Miller story” this remains my favourite movie of all time and when it is on, that is my time, sit down, shut out all the noise and enjoy the wonderful story on how he created a unique sound that is still practiced to this day. And just like any good story it abruptly ends with his sad demise. A wonderful film in my eyes.
Secondly a tv series. That goes to the amazing Carl Sagan and his years ahead of its time “Cosmos” series. For a youngster brought up through the space race years there was a hunger for knowledge of our universe, that this series more than catered for. I have this entire series on DVD and it has even been updated from its original issue date in 1980. In 1986 more animations and commentary were added. Sagan passed away in 1996. He was the science teacher we all wished we had at school.
So that’s it for me, two of the finest televisual treats that I am aware of and still watch to this very day.
Have a wonderful day. Don’t let anyone take you down.
This is the first prompt for days that I’ve been able to answer as I’d already answered those others previously. I’m going to make a slight change to this prompt and remove the word “Hate”. I never use this word as it’s such an awful one, and unfortunately it’s too prevalent in our world at present. I’m going to use the word “Dislike” as dislike can always be improved upon rather than the other word that is just so final. Once Hate is in place. There really is no turning back. So here we go.
Anyone that keeps an eye on this blog and reads the content will know I’m an individual who likes to keep himself busy. Just look at the projects and stuff I’ve posted recently, and the fact I still have 18 posts still in draft mode and you will see I’m a busy guy. On top of that I am a full time employed individual with a house to run a garden to look after and a wife who loves spending (Bless her x)
My time is quite well planned, so when that phone call comes in asking me, “Are you busy?” That’s when I have a sharp intake of breath. Normally it involves fulfilling tasks for friends and family, giving time that is precious to me and in many cases already accounted for. Now don’t get me wrong, I do not mind helping anyone, there is no greater pleasure in seeing someone’s face light up at the end of a well done project. The thing is I take so many on, that it normally means the same job at my own home is being neglected, it’s always more fun doing the job at someone else’s property for some unknown reason though.
The reason I dislike being asked is that I just can’t damn well say no. Saying no makes me feel guilty but that’s just the guy I am. I guess to me it’s just like that word “Hate” it’s just not in my vocabulary.
So that’s why I dislike being asked this question as I’m just not wired to say “No”.
One day I’ll learn to say it. But that’s not today. And probably even tomorrow.
Hey ho.
Happy days everyone.
This is a jest post as all the prompts that have appeared recently courtesy of WP, are repeat suggestions, and there is no point in answering them if nothing has changed.
For the last 7 days now me and the good lady have succumbed to a quite nasty cold that we believe was obtained from a trip to the south of Iceland. A couple of inconsiderate souls behind us on the bus were coughing and sneezing throughout the trip and I believe they wanted to share their misery with us. Well it has worked. Thanks for that.
We’ve been through massive ups and downs in illness this week, and the thing the common cold does brilliantly is to give you the impression you are getting better and then the next day hit you with a more ferocious, and violent second infection. That was on day three and four this week and the second wave was when the sore throat from hell hit, it did give me a lovely husky tone though.
Normally as a couple it is usually only the one of you that goes down with it, and the other partner who signed that invisible contract looks after you and makes you feel more comfortable. That is where the Manflu accusation usually comes in as the Female of the relationship undoubtedly ends up attending to the needs of the mortally wounded male in the partnership. There has been none of that this week as we both Cough and splutter around the house, with zombie like motions both sounding like honking geese with our constant barking coughs.
Now this was a real show of love and commitment and we have both gotten through it.
And the wife has not been able to use the Manflu tag against me once, as she has suffered it too. I may use this post as a reference for her to look back to during any future discussions regarding how this situation developed 😂
I haven’t missed work though. “How selfish” I hear you say, but you are wrong. I work mainly alone and the only contact I normally have with anyone is when I hand over at each end of the shift. I have contacted my colleagues prior to handovers and these have been carried out as they were in Covid times in the carpark. I haven’t used the office, I’ve stayed mobile in the van. The last thing I want to do is to pass this on to my colleagues and their families.
Day 7, today we are both a bit better, another day indoors will probably see us well, we have been drinking plenty, eating as best we can, and taking many potions and lotions to get us through. I think we can finally remove the “Unclean” sign from the front door, and ask that guy with the barrow who keeps passing by to stop shouting “ Bring out your dead!” In the grand scheme of things we are fine though and as stated this post is a jest post.
It could be the first documented case of Manflu transmission to the Female species, and I witnessed it first hand. I wonder if our fickle governments should consider a lockdown?
Stay safe and healthy everyone. Have a super day.
If you could be someone else for a day, who would you be, and why?
I’d like to be my father for the day. Not because he was someone who could be admired and loved and cherished, he was none of that. He was a nasty evil man that made my mothers, my younger sisters and my life an absolute misery.
I would like to know what made him tick, what was his reasoning and did he ever consider getting help for the way he was.
I’d kick start that change even if I could’ve been him for a day. He has ruined my life and still haunts me in nightmares to this day. Never was I more pleased when someone passed away, it’s a horrible thing to say but my life began in earnest that day. However my faith and beliefs tell me we will meet again one day and that is what bothers me now, I’m not prepared for that..
His evil ways, I carry as a burden everyday.
As a child it is not right that you have to be protecting your mother from abuse and a little girl for being downright petrified of her own father. As for what I endured it goes to the grave with me.
I’ve always said to my wife I want to be a better man and be nothing like him. I’ve managed that well, I have never raised a hand to woman in my life and will never do so. My mother was a punchbag and far too many times it was me that absorbed those punches as I tried to protect her.
I have moods occasionally and I put them down to being like him, and I dislike it when someone says I look like my father, there is no one I’d rather be.
It’s a curse to be honest, and here I am just a few small years away from retirement still paying the price, and very much afraid.
It’s not fair. Domestic abuse is not acceptable, it affects lives for longer than you can imagine, it’s probably going to be with me way into the afterlife. It’s a life and death sentence. And he is the winner. It’s wrong.
Peace to you all.
Describe the most ambitious DIY project you’ve ever taken on.
I’ll always attempt anything, but when it comes to plumbing or high voltage electricity, that’s when I get the professionals involved.
In my current home the most ambitious DIY has probably been landscaping the garden. We purchased a rickety old house that’s been a constant project since it was brought, back in 2018. So really that could be the most ambitious couldn’t it?
Anyway, the one I’ve enjoyed most is landscaping the garden, not concreted over with no concerns for wildlife, my garden was designed around the needs of the Hedgehogs and birdlife we have that visit throughout the year. They have easy access to the whole garden, a part that is wilded for them to forage in and plenty of food and water stations as well.
We also have a feral cat “Tabs” who has lived in our garden longer than we have, she gets on with us, we feed her and she has plenty of weather protection in and around the garden, and she tolerates the hedgehogs, so that’s harmonious.
The garden has been a big project taking about 6 years to reach a maturity with flowers, shrubs and trees all planted to create a little bit of the country side in a city urban environment. I am so proud of my garden come spring time when all the new buds are breaking through, and it is a riot of colours come summertime. And it took a lot of planning as it’s a north facing garden.
The gardens the place i’d rather be, it’s like producing art, art that changes on a weekly basis.
Have a super day.
What is the biggest challenge you will face in the next six months?
Well there’s a question.
I think my biggest personal challenge is going to be health related, things that have concerned me in the past, that were under control, have now started to raise their horrible little heads above the parapet again. But there is always hope, and if you have a modicum of hope then you are in a good place. Anyway I’m not going to bore anyone with my issues.
Let’s look at what other challenges I’m liable to face in the next six months. I know that within the next few weeks my wife will be saying that the house needs to go up for sale, that’s because we’ve been looking around a little town on the outskirts of where we live and we’ve seen some nice properties, ones that remain warm in winter unlike our old 1930s semi that we currently reside in. And when that day comes where she says it’s happening, I’m then going to be fully employed getting the place spruced up and dealing with those little diy projects that I’ve put on hold for sometime. That said, we also have a plan if we don’t decide to sell, where we are going to extend the property that will also keep me occupied for many a month.
So I anticipate being challenged to work as much outside of work as inside it, but hey that’s nothing new!
I think in the Uk as general though, we are all going to be challenged over the next few months especially with the ever increasing cost of living, and a wage structure that is not rising commensurately. Businesses, especially those smaller ones that are failing miserably as there is no support from a system that is systematically strangling the life from them, I know of this first hand as friends in such a business are really struggling.
So forget my little struggles, as a society the next six months, will probably make or break us as a collective, it’s getting to the point that one more little straw will break the camels back. I sincerely hope I’m very wrong and everything will miraculously change, but it’s just that my realistic head thinks it’s not going to be, but as I said at the very beginning this is where “Hope” comes in to play.
I Hope that things improve for everyone in the next six months, as it cannot be allowed to decline any further.
Stay safe, be happy.
What advice would you give to your teenage self?
To be honest there would be a small number of things I’d advise teenage me to reconsider.
Firstly to avoid negative people whenever possible, as they drain every single last piece of hope and happiness from you. What they gain from it, I just don’t know. They are poisonous.
Take every opportunity to learn, don’t get caught out by the advance of technology, be a step ahead of yourself and protect your place in society.
Avoid addiction at all cost, your life is literally in your hands, don’t follow like a sheep, be brave and say no, you’ll thank me later in life.
Be your own boss, grab the opportunity to step out on your own, and be answerable to yourself only.
Move to a country where you pay less to the taxman.
Just be nice to people. It will open many doors for you.
Isn’t hindsight a wonderful thing.
Stay safe and be peaceful.
Foxes Den 
You must be logged in to post a comment.