Tag: Thoughts

Now be truthful

It’s good to dream, and even better to achieve

You have three magic genie wishes, what are you asking for?

Truthfully, and from my own personal point of view it would be: eternal happiness, better health and a guaranteed life security for my family.

In keeping with the majority of the population and at risk of sounding like a contestant in the Miss World contest it would be: Respect for all, World Peace and the end to famine.

The second paragraph though made up for political correctness and to pacify a world TV audience is probably what, in truthfulness, we would all want, and to be honest, if it could be obtained then everything in the first paragraph would easily be achieved.

With no mention of money.

If everything in paragraph two was achievable, you’d be amongst the richest people in the world. We all would.

Worth thinking about and considering, isn’t it?

Have a lovely day.

Blah blah….

When everything in life lines up perfectly to cause maximum confusion

Have you ever had one of those days where you are determined to write something but just don’t know what to write about? I’m having one of those days today, I don’t even know what the title of the post is, hence I’ve just called it Blah, blah as a draft title.

I might keep it at that.

I look through all of the posts that i subscribe to and I’m immensely impressed by the frequency that some posters write at, you guys are so organised and regimented that i can be nothing more than mightily impressed. And i am. Well done all of you.

This site, as i have stated previously, on many occasions was put in place purely as an extension to the journal i used to keep by my bedside. However it has also extended to be a journal of my hobbies and interests, in no way was it ever to have a professional “Air” to it and to that extent i have been very successful.

I’m inherently aware that lately i have used this medium to whinge and moan about a number of things, one of those is the process (or should i say endurance) of moving home in the UK. Before you shut your computers down and redirect to a site on do it yourself lobotomies, I’m not going to go on about it too much in this post, i promise. I might just touch on it a teeny tiny bit, sorry.

So let’s get it over with. After the collapse of the chain on Monday, a new purchaser was in the frame by Wednesday, who had previously viewed the house and loved it. They were disappointed that we had sold, and left instructions with the agent that should things not work out then they would be happy to step in. Their dream came true and on Wednesday they officially committed to purchasing, however the price they were offering was lower than we wanted, you can’t win them all i guess. The whole process rides on them coming back again early next week, and to be honest it could still fall flat on its face. And it probably will. However the wife is now in a better state of mind and we have had some good discussion on how we carry things forward. Things are good, and we have plans. Either way, whatever happens it was meant to be. Just roll with the punches, that’s life.

See i told you it would be brief.

Now, health. I don’t normally talk health as it’s no one’s business apart from mine. And the wife’s. I’m fast approaching a landmark birthday, and as you get older, things start to happen. Things that make you question yourself, ”That’s never happened before”. Well, somethings occurred that has made me contact the doctor. And if you live in the UK you would generally understand that, that alone is no easy task. To partake in the 8am lottery to get a doctor’s appointment is no task for the weak hearted. How ironic, as that is exactly what my problem appears to be. The ultimate test of strength and endurance.

You get on the phone at 8am when the doctor’s appointments line opens, within 3 minutes you are number 32 in the queue, and at this point you realise there is probably no point at hanging on as you are not going to get to see anyone today. Just remain incapacitated and try and call back tomorrow, there’s a good lad!

No wonder many people just say, “sod it, what’s the point” and that’s probably why at this stage our entire hospital and A&E system is at bursting point. Crazy. The NHS is such a diamond, but it’s at a straining point that can’t be sustained, it just can’t handle the demands put upon it, and its the every day man and woman on the street that will eventually pay the price.

The good news is that prices for cremations have dropped in price, a classic sign of supply and demand being in perfect harmony.

My head is full of bloat at the moment, and i just had to unload some of it here, how do you writers put it all into some type of order? That’s what I don’t understand. Where do you get your motivation from?

My entire life is packed into boxes at the moment, and i really do miss the activities that gave me a little bit of artistic licence, I’m on all the auction sites at the moment just itching to push that “Buy now” button, but its hard….very hard. I already have 13 projects on WordPress currently in draft mode, awaiting completion but this entire process of moving home has sent my anxiety and patience levels through the roof, but I’m keeping it together somehow, i have to stay strong for my wife. However she is in exactly the same situation as me, and at times she well and truly puts me to shame. Selfishness has no position in a stable relationship, we are partners, and partners share the burden, rethink your attitude, refocus and share the burden. Simple as that.

So that’s today’s rant put to paper…or the cloud, and do i have a suitable title now? No I don’t. So Blah, blah it is then.

Stay safe. Have a beautiful day.

Sitting on the fence…. I just knew it.

Don’t ever let anyone force you into a false feeling of comfort.

The sale of the house has just collapsed miserably. I always said it would, much to the frustration of my dear wife, we are all packed up, we have storage in place in another town and that’s almost full. The house is empty…. And then the inept estate agent calls to say the buyer has pulled out due to being made redundant today. That’s highly unlikely as he still wants to make us another offer, a derisory one, for a lot less money. Bastard.

I’ve distrusted this process since the day it started, I think you’d be aware of this if you read my posts, the estate agents have also miraculously found someone else who is willing to pay again, a derisory price as they have people circling the pit of doom waiting for situations such as this when they know someone is very advanced in the purchase process, so they can circle like carrion, or scavengers to be precise, expecting the seller to accept a ridiculous offer. We’re not like that though, we’re not going to succumb to the absolute scumbags who partake in this disgusting game that is the British property selling market.

Am I angry? Not as much as I should be, no doubt we are going to lose financially as now we have to pay our solicitors, but the frustrating thing is that those who broke the chain should be partially responsible, but as it is here in dear old Blighty, that’s not how it’s done. We were asked to sign a contract a couple of days back, I’m glad I didn’t, that would have committed us to being liable at this stage to a sum in excess of £30k, with nothing to show for it. Apathy rules sometimes.

I’m more upset at how my wife has reacted. As I’ve always said she’s the eternal optimist and was always pulling me up about my fence sitting stance. I’m now worried for her, as she has sunk her heart into this new property hook line and sinker. She’s totally beside her self and I’ve been dreading this day for so long. My work starts now. Not only has the lying git of a seller ruined her dreams, he’s now shouldered me with the task of having to now bring her back to absolute reality that she’s not going to realise her dreams. I can do that though, I’ve done it before as it’s my duty as her husband to do so. She will soon be back in the room as they say. She is going to be looked after and cuddled constantly, it’s a minor setback, and we can now look at upgrading what we already have. We are fortunate as we already have a home, many are not. We just have to count our blessings and realise this.

I feel remarkably calm, not smug, as I have already prepared myself for this failure. That’s how I seem to work. Sometimes it can be very wrong, this time I feel that my stance has been justified. I’m not gloating, far from it, I just think sitting on the fence occasionally pays off.

Don’t ever let anyone force you into a false feeling of comfort. Trust your instincts, and go with them. It will all turn out well in the end. Be grateful and thankful for what you have, and have had.

Have a great day.

More moving shenanigans

Yet more moving shenanigans, we’ll get there one day.

I apologise for occupying my timeline with these random updates regarding our impending move to a new home, and the weird process that goes on behind the scenes whilst buying and selling.

However, our life at this particular moment is totally consumed with these activities, and anything else such as projects and hobbies have long since been packed away into boxes and are currently sitting in another town, elsewhere in the county, in a storage container in preparation of that impending move.

Part of our life in this little 10×10 unit.

We’ve been away for 8 days in Madeira, even during this time the solicitors have been a pain in the ass, wanting information and paperwork that was just not accessible whilst sitting on an island in the North Atlantic. These are highly paid and extremely intelligent beings that couldn’t even open a pdf file that I was requested to send, “It won’t open”, they said. I opened it quite simply as it has always opened, and eventually had to phone the solicitor to explain to them how to open a pdf file. (I bet that call cost won’t be deductible from my bill)

I was baffled at the lack of ability to open a simple file.

Today my wife walked to the estate agents to give them her weekly pep talk that usually includes the words “inept” and “incompetent” however to her surprise, this week they were waiting for her to say “ohh you will be exchanging contracts by the end of the month”. My wife stunned at this comment laughed and walked out to where she met me on the high street, I wasn’t sure if she was funny ha ha laughing or just starting to lose it. I suspect it was the latter….it was.

Because….

Our buyer apparently still has a few documents to submit, and they have not yet even arranged a survey.

Our new house isn’t ready yet either. We popped over today, and we now at least have a garage, but no door or drainage, decoration is not complete and they are yet to talk to the wife about her choice of tiles and other decor. I suspect the house will not be finished this side of Christmas, but I’m happy to be proved wrong. Our builders want a sign off of the 17th October, having seen the property today, and the fact that this deadline is only four days away, there is more chance of me qualifying as a trained neurosurgeon in that time than the builders meeting that deadline. It’s just not going to happen.

Still quite a bit of work, in and out, to do

So, she was laughing as she was starting to lose it….

Bless her. A little cuddle brought her back to reality and we then laughed, funny ha ha style 😂

So to cut a long story short there are about three deadline dates out there and to be honest, in lay man’s terms, and to use quite a course old English saying, they don’t know their “Arse from their elbow”

And no, as I have always stated right from the start of this process, I still don’t trust a single one of them and quite expect the whole thing to collapse due to their collective incompetencies.

Hey ho, we’re keeping a sunny disposition, there are far more important things going on in the world, and we accept that. I just can’t stomach incompetence though, and that’s my pet peeve.

Have a super day, wherever you are. Stay safe, be kind.

Even to estate agents and solicitors 😂👍

Back to chilly old Blighty

Checking in after a little time away..

Apparently I’ve not posted anything for a few weeks so I’d better, provide a little update of life as it is at the moment.

We’ve just yesterday, arrived back from a lovely 8 days away on the beautiful island of Madeira. I’m not a good flyer, I hate it to be honest, I panic, I sweat and I prepare to meet my maker on every flight, to be honest I’m very hard on myself. To therefore choose to fly to an island, that notoriously has one of the most difficult landing strips on the planet was not probably one of my best decisions. That landing almost finished me, the brakes were on so hard I was almost in the seat ahead of me, how we even had rubber left on the tyres I’ll never know. But the holiday was lovely. Some pics below.

Some pictures of Madeira, there are hundreds more, but I won’t punish you here.

There are two individuals who seem to have had such an impact on the island, that their presence is seen at most places that you visit. Christiano Ronaldo, a son of Madeira and sporting legend owns massive swathes of the island and the locals won’t have a word said against him, rightly so as he is a local lad that has done good. Secondly is Sir Winston Churchill, he only visited the island twice with a fifty year gap in between, but he painted some local pictures and as a result there are statues and areas dedicated to him all around the island.

Then we came home.

A change in temperature drop of about 15 degrees is extremely noticeable, it’s cold at home, winter is starting to wrap its frosty tentacles around the UK.

The house move is stagnant, nothing is occurring at the moment and I suspect the money people are rubbing their hands as the bill increases with the time they are taking. We’ll just have to be patient, I’m still not confident of what will occur, as I’ve stated from the start my confidence is at an all time low and always has been. Incompetence reigns supreme. (Them not us)

So that’s about it, apart from some new health conditions that I won’t bother you with, I’ll save those for another day, just things that I’ve never experienced before, starting to occur on a more regular basis, growing pains if you like.

So I hope you are all well, being kind to whoever you meet, and most of all that you are all happy.

I couldn’t ask for more.

Take care.

Low worth, litter and hatred.

What’s the trait you value most about yourself?

I’ve always had a very low opinion of my self worth, and that’s not really bothered me through my life. It’s not the best trait though and sometimes little tweaks have to take place to just bolster things a little bit. I manage it ok and it causes me no issues. I guess I don’t like being knocked down, so staying low on the radar allows me to avoid such situations.

The trait I probably value the most is the ability, to arise early, and never be late for work or an appointment, and most of all knowing that others value me for my reliability, I’m always there when I need to be, and I don’t let minor colds or ailments get in my way.

I’ve had it mentioned on a couple of rare occasions that because I was delayed by traffic maybe, and was 5 minutes later than when I normally hand over at work, (even though I’m still not officially handing over for another 30 minutes) that they were worried that I’d driven into a ditch or something! That says something about their combined expectations and my reliability, come rain or shine, plague or pestilence, Dave can always be relied on.

So in a nutshell I value my reliability, and in close second place because I was brought up in an age when we were constantly told not to litter, I don’t litter at all. Every little bit of scrap no matter how small will sit in my pocket until I reach a suitable waste receptacle, that’s just me. It’s really easy and I’d suggest everyone tries it.

And in third place, but maybe it should be higher, I don’t use the word “Hate”. It’s a horrible word and so final and irreversible, whereas “dislike” can be worked on, the word hatred is final.

Have a super day.

The history

Why are we cancelling everything?

What aspects of your cultural heritage are you most proud of or interested in?

In respect of my heritage, history has always fascinated me, and now it annoys me in equal measures.

What fascinates me as it always has, since back in my childhood days, is that I love to know how people worked, lived and managed to survive in a period of time when just one random off the cuff comment could have you accused of many a crime. God forbid if you said anything about the establishment as you’d probably be missing your head before too long.

And the annoying part is that we are in a society where groups of individuals are wanting to cancel everything. People are wanting to wipe out history because they disagree with what happened. That’s history folks! The fact that we don’t (in general, good society, anyway) go around inflicting on the populace accusations of “Witchcraft” “Heresy” and whatever, means we have learned something from that history. We generally don’t make the mistakes of the past as we have become better people and learned from that horrific history that pre dates us all.

She’s right….

I can’t get enough of history, it’s potentially my favourite subject and I will gladly overdose on it in either book or film format. I just love it.

I don’t feel the urge to go and lop off someone’s head, or to take part in hanging, drawing and quartering anyone (not today anyway….) and that’s because we have all learnt, and moved on from those terrible times. We learn from the mistakes of the past, and to wipe out history leaves us in the unenviable position of not knowing the difference between right and wrong, we might as well all go and bury our heads in the sand and just imagine it never happened.

I have news for you Sherlock, it did happen, and as long as we learn, develop and make better then we are being taught by our historical misdemeanours, hopefully to never venture back to those dark old days.

Cancelling solves nothing. In the words of the Jamaican activist- Marcus Garvey,

“A people without the knowledge of their past history, origin and culture is like a tree without roots”

And he isn’t wrong, I used to have a tee shirt with that on it in my teenage years..

History, it shapes our futures. Don’t cancel it.

Have a superb day…

World mental health day

World mental health day and men’s arrogance and reluctance to talk

I just wanted to share a post that was sent to me. Today is World mental health day, and this is one of the most hard hitting, and well formed videos that I think I have ever seen. It was produced by Norwich City football club here in the Uk, and in my eyes it is probably one of the best pieces of film I have ever watched, simply just asking you to keep an eye on friends and colleagues. Simple and straight to the point.

Here in the Uk 40% of deaths in males under the age of fifty, is a result of poor mental health. A horrendously high amount you must agree, and totally avoidable if everyone was just more aware of subtle changes of those around us. Have a look at the video in the link below, it’s hard hitting as the outcome is not what you’d expect.

I have in the last couple of weeks dealt with my 20th fatality on the railway, no one explained in the beginning, on the job description, that my job would involve such horrendous outcomes, and I have witnessed scenes that I would not wish upon anyone. Do I suffer? I’d tell you no, to your face, but sometimes I’m in utter turmoil.

But I have a peer group at work, that are there for me, we are all there for each other as we get no support from work to be honest. If we didn’t talk to each other, and offer words of comfort and reassurance, I’d hate to know where any of us would be now.

Men are stubborn sods full of false bravado, I’m one of them, and I’m great at pulling the curtains over a difficult situation. Smiling eyes I might have, my confidence may seem through the roof, but in the quiet periods or the wee dark hours, I’m asking myself questions i do not know the answers to.

I’m praying I never attend another fatality, but in reality I know another one is never far away, I’m lucky that I have the support of my colleagues to see me through, we talk, we drink tea.

Talking works. It saves lives. And lets people know they are not alone.

You are not alone, and will never be. Don’t let those thoughts rule your head, those thoughts need to be out in the open. They are poison, and the poison needs to be let. Talking helps.

Stay safe. You are not alone.

We’ve found a place…and reality checks

Yesterday we viewed a house. We are both super impressed by it, and have instructed the solicitors to start work on it and have placed a holding fee upon said property.

The solicitors are already rubbing their grubby little hands, as within an hour of instructing them they are already asking for various payments in advance. I should have known.

The wife, in full supervisor mode

It’s a new home, on a site that I have passed more than a few times a day in the last two years of its construction, i witnessed the day they broke ground, so I know the area very well. It’s in a nice town about 12 miles from where we currently are, it’s pretty much all we are looking for. Believe me it will be our last move unless we hit big time on the National lottery. This so far is proving to be stressful beyond what I have ever experienced on previous moves.

Full supervisor mode

And I still believe the reason for that is the incompetence we have experienced in the early days of the selling experience. Confidence is still so exceptionally low that the sale will ever complete, and it’s strange that we cannot be excited as we are just waiting for the whole chain to collapse. We’ve never experienced such lethargy before and I can only put it down to how this whole process has evolved over the past few months. We’ve always been so excited and positive on previous sales we’ve completed before, this time though they have really kicked the trust and excitement out of us. We are but a shell of our former selves.

Anyway without sounding too dramatic, it will be what it will be. We are fortunate to have a home and if we end up staying here it is no loss at all. We are fortunate and must never forget that.

I spoke to my friend Ed today, he’s the guy I spoke about a few weeks back in my blog who has a diagnosis of stage 4 cancer in both his lungs and kidneys. He’s managing just superbly at the moment and his immunotherapy treatment is progressing just fine. Even despite his diagnosis he is so upbeat and chipper with a superb attitude.

And there’s me whining about a bloody house. What a prat. It was the kick in the pants I needed I tell ya.

It’s a horrible analogy I know, but someone is always worse off than you are.

I’m now saying thank you for what I have, everything I have been given, and for whatever I receive going forward. Just writing this post has made me go from down hearted and depressed to thankful and hopeful.

Thanks to my friend Ed, you have made me see sense and taught me a big lesson today. My friend, I wish you continued good health and I pray for you and your family on a daily basis.

Sometimes, a step back from a situation and a full evaluation of your current situation is all that is needed.

We all need to do a reality check from time to time. Today was that time for me.

And I am truly grateful for all I have in my life. I really need nothing else. Just be humble.

Have a super day my friends. Stay humble. Stay safe.

Financial leaches and stuff

It’s been a tad quiet around here lately, especially on the blogging side, and there is a reason for this. As stated recently, the house has sold but my disdain towards the estate agents still remains and to be honest I don’t trust them as far as I could throw them. For me to regain just a modicum of trust in them they would have to pull off some quite stunning and spectacular acts of estate agent “activity” whatever that may be.

The solicitors are now deeply involved and rubbing their hands and then cupping them to catch the continuous flow of cash that they seem to be extracting from us. What I’m getting at here is you manage to find a way to save a couple of thousand pounds only for these leaches to suddenly drop another bill for a similar amount. It’s just like they are using the smart speakers in the house to listen into our discussions on our finances…the swines!

Anyway that said our search for a suitable abode goes on, we have some candidates and one in particular that the wife has fallen deeply in love with. I suspect that this will ultimately be our target. The thing is that as much as I want to, I just can’t get excited. The total incompetence of the selling agents has scarred me and I expect this sale to collapse at any time, there is something that just doesn’t sit right with me. I try communicating this to the wife but I don’t want to rain on her parade, she is super excited where as I’m being super cautious, we are both at total opposite ends of the spectrum at the moment and I’m struggling to be honest. I seem to have lost faith and that’s very unlike me, but once bitten twice shy as they say.

My wife bless her, is the eternal optimist, she’s the one you want around you. Me however, I class as a pessimistic optimist, or maybe even just a realist, I don’t really know myself to be honest. I’m that one sitting very firmly, not rocking on the middle of that fence, and as I’m getting older the battle scars are ensuring that the balance is gaining a rock steady gyroscopic steadiness, I’m not budging in any way.

Work is exceedingly busy at the moment we have all kinds of issues going off and there isn’t enough hours in the day to get things done, however it is a welcome distraction from the day to day goings on in and around the home.

That said, we have a family party on Friday that I’m looking forward to, before delivering my wife to her elderly friend’s house, where she is going to spend a week looking after her. It will be a quiet week at home for me, and I’m going to miss her keeping me in check and being the ying to my yang as they say. To be honest I think I’m going to struggle, but I’ll just have to get on with it, it’s only a week and other people need her more at the moment. I’m lucky, I always have her around whereas others have no one. This is where she becomes that one little angelic presence in everyone’s life. I’m fortunate to have her presence in my life, and I’m eternally grateful for that. It still remains that I will miss her immensely. It will be a lesson in patience. I’m sure I’ll be fine, she’ll still check in and keep me on the level, that I know for sure.

All projects are currently packed away apart from a couple of easy ones that will appear on here shortly, I have a camera to service for a photographer friend, but that’s just going to have to wait.

Life plods on, I sincerely hope you are all having a peaceful time, stay safe and just continue being that wonderful presence that you are. Thank you for passing by, it’s always appreciated.