Category: Thoughts

My Primary school teacher

Describe a man who has positively impacted your life.

This is an easy one for me. And to save repeating myself I will just refer you to an earlier post I made back in 2023 regarding this man.

Thoughts 25/3/23

That man was a teacher, absolutely the most influential man I have had the pleasure of coming across in my life. I had a questionable upbringing and my own father could have held this accolade, however he failed in most aspects of both mine and his life. He was a nasty, jealous and dangerous man.

Mr Twelftree however stepped up to the plate and was the polar opposite of my father. He was an exceptional teacher and mentor.

This man has, and will forever be the most influential person I have met in my life. The teaching profession has such an effect on young lives, and here I am 45yrs later still holding a torch for this man and his profession. He is an exceptional man, I would love to shake his hand and simply say, “Thank you”.

Stay safe, stay humble.

The total opposite

Is your life today what you pictured a year ago?

I like to normally stay upbeat, but these recent prompts have really got me thinking. I know everyone wants to see the “Yes my life is perfect” answers, but I’m afraid you’ll have to head to Insta and Fakebook for those replies. To be honest looking back at the last year it’s been fairly “Shit” to be honest.

Now I’m not going to fill this post with my woes and issues as there are a lot of people out there that have had it a damn sight worse than me, but the question has been asked and I have to answer it truthfully.

The family is on the point of breaking up due to “family” things, there has been illness, emergencies and grief by the bucket load, however myself and my wife have managed to keep smiling through it all, hiding exactly what we feel on the inside. As I have stated, there are others out there that have had it a lot worse, and to be honest my thoughts and prayers lay with them. Being a strong willed couple, my Wife and I can overcome much that life throws our way, and hopefully we have enough left in reserve to help others who may not have that support to fall back on.

So yes, we’ve had a bad year, just like a lot of people, but we have also learned from our discomfort, pain and uncertainty.

So through mild adversity we remain united and strong, and that is a good sign….isn’t it? I guess all is not that bad, once you have faced the pain and issues head on.

Stay safe everyone.

Loss is forever

What skills or lessons have you learned recently?

No skills but a valuable lesson. It’s a strange one and you’ll probably think I’m a right ass but it hit me straight between the eyes I tell you.

I was standing staring at a picture of a dearly departed and very much loved family member that I was very close to. It suddenly hit me that I will never ever, see or hear this individual again. I don’t know why this occurred but it was just like a wave of undeniable acceptance swept across me and it shocked me.

I have my faith, that I question frequently, but it gives me comfort, and part of that comfort lies in believing I will meet my loved ones once again. But the question now is will I?

Can’t answer that I’m afraid as can no one else, I guess the truth will unfold on the day of my last breath. My god, that will be a day of truths if ever there was one.

It was just such a strange and unexpected moment.

Stay happy and humble.

I Care

Tell us one thing you hope people say about you.

I’ve probably covered this in a number of earlier posts, however this one in particular probably sums it all up just fine. Why bother? I care that’s why.. I’m a pretty hard shelled character and it takes an awful lot to gain my confidence, but I do hope people go away from meeting me and say that I’m a caring soul.

Says it all

I have been hurt an awful lot in the past especially by those who were put on this planet to help me on my way but failed miserably. Through this all though I have kept and nurtured a caring attitude as I don’t wish for anyone to be alone with poisonous thoughts and attitudes. If I achieve nothing else in my life at least I can rest comfortably knowing I have helped along the way.

There is an old saying,” Helping one person might not change the whole world, but it could change the world for that one person”

Simple. Isn’t it. Stay humble.

Wanted: free time

I so much wish to write some posts of substance on this blog but in the last few weeks I just can’t be bothered. I’ve reposted a few posts that I’ve liked or found a familiarity with but that’s about it.

Looking at my draft posts I have 14 – yes 14 that are in the process of being completed dating back to May of this year. These are all a number of projects I have on going including Camera repair, musical keyboards, video games, a complete radio control boat build as well as radios and some old cassette players that I have taken on board. I’m stuck for a number of reasons.

I do most of my repairs in our conservatory out of the main house away from the wife. My equipment that I use can be moved in three large boxes that take about an hour or so to assemble and disassemble, hence I like to be able to leave it assembled for a while to get any satisfaction and achievement out of what I’m trying to repair. If I had to put it all together and take it straight down again I think I’d lose total interest in the task at hand.

However it’s getting near Christmas and the wife has invited her entire family around for Christmas Day dinner, hence I have had to make myself and my gear scarce, as she plans to be feeding them all in our conservatory, my workshop.

It’s like I have had to shut up shop for the season, with so much still to do. I’m also awaiting a good number of parts to finish these projects, so that doesn’t help either.

A selection of the backlog of projects I have ongoing

So as it stands, unless I can adapt my kit to be a bit more stealth like then I’m probably not going to be attending to any of these much before the new year.

That said, has anyone tried these usb portable soldering irons at all? I may be in the market for one.

In the meantime I suppose I’ll just have to mingle and be nice. It’s going to be a tough Christmas 😂

Why do they do it?

I say to anyone that asks what my role at work is, that I am there to keep trains on the tracks and people off them. My actual role is a little more complex but to me that’s my role in a nutshell.

And sometimes they unfortunately clash. Like tonight for instance, no one fortunately was injured but they could well have been.

Some of the darling youths of the East Midlands, bless them when they are bored just love to try and cause misery and inconvenience to others, tonight they put a ladder on the line and a line of ballast on the track to try and derail a train. It’s all shits and giggles to them however a train unit has had its braking system ruined and will be out of service for tomorrow’s peak.

Crushed ballast
What remains of a ladder

So if you happen to be travelling between Sheffield and London tomorrow, and your service is cancelled this could be the reason why. One day these little darlings will actually cause serious injury, they’ll probably get off because they were bored and didn’t understand, but they are good kids and always go to church on Sunday! Tosh, they are unsupervised little shits that want to see people get hurt. I know it’s not all youths but there is an underbelly of society that lets them down. This train hit this obstruction at 70mph, tonight we were lucky, tonight everyone goes home to their loved ones, tomorrow might be a different story.

Don’t play on the railway. I work on it and can confirm it’s probably one of the most dangerous places to be, it’s not safe at all for the untrained individual. And for gods sake tell your kids to keep clear as I don’t wish to be bagging them up when it all goes wrong.

Morning..probably

Are you more of a night or morning person?

Working a 24hr shift roster as I currently do it’s hard to give a true preference. I have never had a problem in rising though and am quite proud to say I have never been late to work in my life, for that I can be totally relied on.

I love an early rise, I like my cup of tea or two before the rigours of the day kick in, yes I’d say I’m more of a morning person.

Shift work really throws your sleep patterns out of kilter though, and there are times when you have changed from night shift to early shifts when you just don’t want to wake up early, but your body says different. There you are due to rise at 04:45 for an early shift but your body and mind decides you are going to be awake about 3 hrs earlier. This is where fatigue steps in.

However a week or two’s holiday sorts this out and after a few days your sleep pattern is sorted. So I’m now quite confident that I’m definitely a morning person. It’s lovely to rise early before the world is totally motivated and get the day underway, nothing is wasted.

Have a lovely day. Peace to you all.

Anti Social media

What technology would you be better off without, why?

It’s poison, venomous and down right nasty and to be honest it allows the less ingenious of society to literally get away with murder.

I admit the advent of the digital age has many benefits but allowing knuckle dragging morons to voice opinions on every subject that they have no knowledge of, or interest in is only a bad thing.

Yep as you can see I have also experienced them as I’m sure everyone else who passes by this post has also experienced one of these individuals.

Influencers, now that’s a joke of a job description if ever I have heard one. Don’t get me started, have we really become such a society that we need these individuals to coerce us into making decisions and purchases on items they have no experience or knowledge in, just because someone offers them a years supply of said item just to spout a load of old tosh on how this is going to change your life. Give me a break 🤦‍♂️

Have a good day. Don’t be influenced or insulted.

End of life

What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make? Why?

That has to be ending the life of a much loved and cherished member of the family, a pet.

In our married life we have had three wonderful little Bichon Frise dogs, who we have rightly or wrongly treated as our children, they have wanted for nothing and had the best that we could bestow on them. We have never had children as we can’t, we obviously upset someone in a previous life and that privilege and pleasure has been taken away from us. We needed surrogates and the dogs were those stand ins. We were very happy.

There comes a time where you have to let go, you notice changes in an animals behaviour, the little whimpers, the constant sleep and the inability to do things, the little looks you get and the realisation that their quality of life is deteriorating. Decisions have to be made.

That final journey to the vets, me driving, my wife cuddling the little package on the back seat and the fight to see through the flood of tears that are clouding your eyes.

The vets bench, the dogs wagging his tail, he’s ok you think, but he’s not. The injection to subdue him, he rests, the second injection and then he’s gone.

The lonely drive home knowing you have left a family member behind, the sadness you are going to feel everyday going forward.

The little things you miss, the what ifs? that suddenly come to mind and the guilt you feel for ending a perfect little life.

We’ve done that three times now and it hurts so damned much, I don’t think we will ever be able to do it again as the pain is just unbearable.

Life is full of hard decisions, but when it ends in the death of a much loved companion, I just don’t think there are many such decisions that are harder to make.

Peace to all. Be safe.

Die…probably

If you didn’t need sleep, what would you do with all the extra time?

I guess it would be counterproductive, as I’m an individual who likes to keep busy, I guess I’d probably work myself into an early grave. what’s the point.

More time, less life. Doesn’t make sense.

Don’t entertain it, have a kip 👍

Have a great day.