Oxymorons are sometimes helpful

What positive emotion do you feel most often?

Difficult one this. I class myself as an optimistic pessimist, it’s a bit of an oxymoron I know but I can’t think of how else to label it.

I’m always prepared for the worst and I upset myself easily there, but I’m also looking for positives to ease the pain I guess. We currently have a situation going on where over the last few days I’ve really been no use to anyone, I’m breaking down a lot, mainly in private but I’ve been caught a couple of times and then I feel shame. I don’t know why but I do.

I’m sticking with my label, if I didn’t I think I’d go over the edge as I tend to think too deeply.

I shouldn’t be looking to the future as that can change in a heartbeat and why should I worry about what hasn’t even happened yet?

But I do.

I need to be thinking of the moment and nothing more.

That’s hard to do.

Peace all.